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Your Custody Agreement Doesn’t Have to Be Set in Stone: Mediation Can Help You Adjust like Gwen Stefani and Gavin Rossdale

Disclaimer: This article does not constitute legal advice. If you have any questions about your individual situation it is best to seek the advice of an experienced legal professional.

Gwen Stefani and Gavin Rossdale divorced in 2016. There are now reports that they are in mediation to renegotiate their custody agreement. The tone of the celebrity news would suggest that this is a scandalous rift, but reviewing your custody agreement in mediation is actually responsible co-parenting! Unlike property division, your custody agreement isn’t fixed. Your children grow and change, and so should your co-parenting arrangements. Reports say that the discussions revolve around differing parenting styles, Rossdale’s changing tour schedule, and Stefani’s Christianity.

Practical and Emotional

In mediation all these topics can be addressed, and they can be distilled into practical resolutions. At BCS we combine psychoanalytical, mathematical and financial approaches to solve problems that can’t be addressed with a one size fits all solution.
Just like with Gwen Stefani and Gavin Rossdale some of these issues may be practical, and some may be emotional or even ideological. There is no rule that says that you can’t make a plan for issues outside the sphere of finance or work schedules. At BCS we believe that these differences too can be transformed into practical commitments. Let’s look at some of the issues that Gwen Stefani and Gavin Rossdale are facing:

Religion

Raising your kids in one religious tradition or another is a very personal choice, but it is also bound to expectations, calendar dates, rituals and festivals. It can divide parents on rules for their child’s behavior, how to talk to their child, and how to structure their child’s holiday time. In mediation, you can figure out how to align your priorities with your co-parent to decide what is best for your child. Rather than sending your kids conflicting messages, mediation can help you find common ground on morality, religion and ritual. Presenting a united front to your kids is important, even if you disagree. With differing views, you can model tolerance for your child.

Work Schedules

Work schedules change or may be seasonal (as in touring with a band). If you are not always able to co-parent fifty-fifty, reviewing your custody agreement in mediation is a responsible way of spreading the weight of parenting.

Parenting Styles

Books and philosophies on parenting styles can differ as much as religion. In falling into conflict with your co-parent over parenting styles you may end up throwing out the baby with the bathwater. It is in your child’s best interest that you manage this conflict rather than allow yourself to be ruled by your principles. Mediation can help you understand how to prioritize your child’s interests, your interests and come to a compromise over child-rearing philosophies.

Who We Are and How We Can Help

We are caring, well-educated mediators who are skilled in applied financial mathematics, the law psychoanalysis, and game theory. We use these approaches to efficiently comprehend your situation and its opportunities for sustainable and agreeable resolution. This may include a review of your parenting plan, spousal support calculations, community property equalization, settlement agreement, and all other aspects of your case. We can either confidentially present you with a private analysis, or mediate the conflict with both of you until resolved. Any resolution you come to will be informed by a deeper analysis of the conflict that can be psychoanalytic and/or more financially-focused. Our high-level divorce mediation services are tailored to the needs of people with complex lives or divorces that may be difficult or protracted. We can intervene to break litigation deadlocks when divorces are already underway. We work with individuals from several cultures and countries, and can help with national and international relocation issues associated with divorce. We are particularly skilled at crafting parenting plans You can visit us at our offices in Boulder, CO, Campbell, CA, Irvine, CA and Beverly Hills, CA. We can also be reached by Telephone, Zoom or Facetime. We are available 7 days a week and at urgent notice. Please contact us to see how we can help.

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